summer night

A poem

It's a soft summer night 
and July is so close by that
you can almost hear the fireworks
exploding above 
making patterns  
red white and blue
all the way down the rainbow
not a color forgotten. 

But it's not quite July 
not yet 
so let's not get ahead.

Spring rain still teeters. 
Fresh dew 
on the grass.
Dew that turns into 
Humidity
when you can't breathe 
or see
because the droplets cloud your mind— 
it's foggy
like a permanent haze 
or poor air quality from smoke.

You sit on your front porch 
splinters digging into your thighs 
the sky barely still a mulberry 
or eggplant color 
as the ephemeral sun says bye 
like you want to say bye. 

Bye to your friends 
and family 
and all past lovers.

An ember from your cigarette falls 
onto your polished toe 
which sits
unmoving
even as the crimson spark drills 
deep. 
burning. 

You rub your left eye
as if 
you could erase the raisin stain
embedded beneath 
from lack of sleep 
because
when you put your phone down 
that's when the thoughts start 

the thoughts of denial 
thoughts of betrayal 
of guilt 
shame

so you don't put the phone down. 
Too scared to face the dark
so you face the light.

A mosquito finds his way to your ankle
and you watch 
as he spears you 
& with a tingle of pleasure
sucks you dry. 
Hopefully dry of all your flaws. 
this mosquito can make you whole again. 
And you watch as he lumbers away
satisfied. 
And you sit there ever the same

unchanged.

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Thank you for reading!! See you guys next time!

Lana :)